A Song of Ice and Fire analysis- Davos Seaworth & Stannis Baratheon

Davos Seaworth

Although his aren’t the most interesting chapters in my opinion -probably due to his close relations to Stannis, who is characterised to be the epitome of dull- I love Davos. I feel like GRRM wrote him almost as compensation for Ned’s death, and a representation of goodness, as I see so many parallels between him and Ned, as with his relationship dynamic to Stannis and Ned’s to Robert. He is incredibly loyal to Stannis and humble in character: ‘If I stayed a smuggler, Allard would have ended on the Wall. Stannis spared him from that end, something else I owe him’. Davos begins with a low sense of self-worth, and so is driven to proving himself to Stannis through loyalty. ‘Everything I am, I owe to him’. He is also motivated by his sons, and to a lesser extent, his wife, although, it has to be said, she is rarely mentioned. Davos will challenge Stannis and stand up for what he feels is right, particularly as the books progress:

 ‘You have given me an honoured place at your table. And in return I give you truth’.

Stannis Baratheon

Stannis has his own similarities to Ned Stark, in terms of his inability to neglect his sense of duty which acts as the basis of his moral codes. There are however, some stark (did not mean the pun) differences in reactions and decisions made in later books as Stannis becomes more desperate, maddened, and arguably indoctrinated by religion (to be fair, the red religion is unquestionably magical and powerful, if a bit grim).

Stannis as a King is an interesting premise, as he is truly indifferent towards the idea, simply acting on his sense of duty. He is, however, also biased by his resentment of Robert and the ways in which he has been overshadowed and underappreciated. ‘When have they ever loved me? How can I lose something I have never owned?’. His personality and character  are shown throughout and is well known, so I don’t feel the need to go into it too much, but I do love these quotes as I believe they sum him up well:

‘Make it Ser Jaime the Kingslayer henceforth,” Stannis said, frowning. “Whatever else the man may be, he remains a knight. I don’t know that we ought to call Robert my beloved brother either. He loved me no more than he had to, nor I him.”

On Renly ‘Fools love a fool’ grumbled Stannis, ‘but I grieve for him as well. For the boy he was, not the man he grew to be.’

‘I am King. Wants do not enter into it. I have a duty to my daughter. To the realm. Even to Robert. He loved me but little, I know, yet he was my brother. The Lannister woman gave him horns and made a motley fool of him’.

Their arc

Davos has more of an influence throughout the series than perhaps even he realises as he routinely acts as a moral compass, and truth teller amongst the council who- like all in game of thrones- pander to Stannis: ‘Davos had come too far with Stannis to play coy now. ‘Last year they were Robert’s men. A moon ago they were Renly’s. This morning they are yours. Whose will they be on the morrow?. ‘And Stannis laughed. A sudden gust, rough and full of scorn. ‘I told you Melisandre’, my Onion Knight tells me the truth’.

 Davos’ birth and low status impact his self-image, but he holds a significant influence over Stannis’ actions, and acts as a rebuttal to Melisandre’s council. I will love GRRM forever for being such an incredibly smart writer, and in writing their relationship, I love the instances like the above quote that act to parallel Ned and Robert, and yet clearly highlight their difference. Davos is not as black and white, not as ‘morally good’, not quite as hesitant to murk around in politically position he has been dealt. It is these traits that allow Davos to live where Ned didn’t, and stand him in better stead for the circumstances that led to Ned’s downfall- imprisonment, the risk of his children, protecting Roberts son, becoming hand, attempting to recruit people to Stannis’ cause.

‘I am a man. I am kind to my wife, but I have known other women. I have tried to be a father to my sons, to help make them a place in this world. Aye, I’ve broken laws, but I never felt evil until tonight. I would say my parts are mixed, m’lady. Good and bad.’ ‘ A grey man. Neither white nor black, but partaking of both.^’ (Melisandre)

 It also serves to show that Stannis is- for now- more just, less clouded, rash and impulsive than Robert. He can listen, and it is when he becomes so entwined in his anger, desperation and fanatical rage that he seems more likely to fail, or head towards the same fate as Robert. It is after the murder of Renly that Stannis reaches a turning point, a point of no return. He has broken his moral code, he has cheated, and he now truly subscribes to Melisandre’s prophecies. He is deeply haunted, and in the extremely unlikable event that he was to become King, he would be a shell of himself and what he stands for.

‘Only Renly could vex me so with a piece of fruit. He brought his doom on with his treason, but I did love him Davos. I know that now, I swear, I will go to my grave thinking of my brother’s peach.’

In following Stannis, Davos is subject to a lot of unpleasant truths that he attempts to avoid, avoiding his guilt by following the mantra that he will do what he can to stop future injustice. His story arc becomes a metaphor for faith and loyalty, and what we become when this is questioned or dark truths begin to unravel. ‘I… I am yours to command. What would you have me do?’ Davos can see the change is Stannis, and it is his will to continue believing in him that carries him forward- and a little bit of denial for the man he thought he knew (strong Ned/Robert vibes). He manages to make use of his influence on Stannis, convincing him not to let Melisandre come to war, for fear of the alienation the red religion will bring in Westeros. This results in a paradox of actions and feelings: Stannis condemns Davos and his later assassination attempt on Melisandre, and yet respects his loyalty, promoting him to hand. I believe that Stannis himself understands that he is wrestling with his actions, morals, and the Kingdom he wants to create; it is this that convinces him to keep Davos close, where he would have condemned others multiple times. He needs duality, he needs to maintain a sense of himself, and Davos is this guide. Even as this is happening, Davos is experiencing his own existential crisis’. He is changed by the death of his children, the stress of his situation, and the knowledge that even he cannot deny the power of the red God.

‘Ours is not a choice between Baratheon and Lannister, between Greyjoy and Stark. It is death we choose, or life. Darkness, or light’. (Melisandre). ‘My heart’, Davos said slowly, ‘is full of doubts’. ‘Ice and fire, he thought. Black and white. Dark and light. Davos could not deny the power of her God’.

I want to mention here, that these chapters are made more interesting than I remembered by the addition of Melisandre and a significant amount of prophecy being told to us through Davos’ lens. I have tabbed prophecy and want to look into it more when I’m further into my reread. Once I’m through my 7000000 Bran and Jon chapters, I’ll bring together all the prophecy and go on a deep internet theory hole of what it all means. Interestingly though, there is another touch of prophecy, told to Davos by Ser Axell:

‘Say what you will. I would never betray Stannis.’ ‘You would. You will. I see it in your face. And I have seen it in the flames as well. R’hallor has blessed me with the gift. Like Lady Melisandre, he shows me the future in the fire. Stannis Baratheon will sit the Iron Throne.’

Quotes like this and references scattered throughout to Davos being a turn cloak are likely less prophecy and more manipulation- people know his influence on Stannis- but I do think they foreshadow a turning point in Davos’ arc, maybe in the form of turning his back on Stannis and towards Jon. This is particularly likely, if and when, Stannis goes full Agamemnon and sacrifices Shireen. I love the Greek myth parallels, even as I loathe what they’ll signify.

Another interesting exchange between the two occurs when Davos’ loyalty is truly questions and he is becoming more reckless:

‘A desperate folly took hold of Davos, a recklessness akin to madness. ‘As you remained loyal to King Aerys when your brother raised his banners?’ he blurted’. ‘I would have it speak the truth. Through the truth is a bitter draught at times. Aerys? If only you knew… that was a hard choosing. My blood or my liege. My brother or my King.’

The decision to free Edric, and Stannis’ concurrent decision to raise him to hand signifies the extent of their relationship and influence. Melisandre understands this and it is dangerous for Davos.

‘What is the life of one bastard boy against a kingdom?’ ‘Everything’, said Davos, softly.’ (Some utilitarian/Kantian philosophy and existential crisis creeping up in their chapters).

And yet Davos stays. Despite his desire to leave, to be with his surviving sons and wife, to be away from politics, away from sorcery. Stannis is above all for him, is his God in a way after serving his ‘justice’, and Davos is one of the many characters in ASOIAF for whom duty comes above all. He is also one of many political figures who stay in the hope of making a small difference, making the terrible ‘less bad’ and doing their part to make a slightly more just world. It is Davos who influences Stannis to go to the wall, a well calculated decision that Davos does not give himself credit for. He is trying to distract Stannis from his fury, from his flailing morals, from Melisandre, and is trying to bring Stannis redemption, purpose and resources a clean way. He has an interesting influence on the story and prophecy, being the one to bring Melisandre and Jon together (despite the fact that he is then sent away by Stannis with the influence of Melisandre).

This sets up Davos for the next stage of his arc- he has more independence, more responsibility and more political power as he becomes involved with Manderley’s plot to find Rickon- and I’m assuming, he believes, Bran?- to the throne as King of the North. We end with Davos hesitantly gathering himself to go off to cannibal island, and Stannis stuck outside Winterfell, becoming startlingly close to Agamemnon/Iphigenia sacrifice territory. I think we’re setting up for the books version of the battle of the bastards, and there are so many exceptional plots in this story that I am EXCITED (assuming of course, that we ever get to read them hahaha). Looking forward to seeing Skagos and Davos’ future part to play in the story! I feel like he’s about to have a lot more interactions with major characters. Also, I got chills reading this part:

‘The north remembers, Lord Davos. The North remembers and the mummers’ farce is almost done’.

‘The young wolf is dead’, Manderly allowed, ‘but that brave boy was not Lord Eddard’s only son.’

Thank you for reading and please let me know your thoughts on anything I’ve said or anything game of thrones! I’m completely amateur at this and just doing it for fun, but I’m finding this reread by POV so rewarding and fun! There’s so much I’d forgotten and I love GRRM with all my heart.

Advertisement

Daenerys Targaryen analysis (part 2 of 2)

A Dance with Dragons

Ruling Meereen

A Dance of Dragons sees Dany’s first taste of ruling in Meereen as she battles to carve her identity as Queen. It is clear that Dany has no interest in Meereen and its people once she has freed them. It is spite, stubbornness and a desire to prove herself that keep Dany here, playing as Queen in a city whose customs she does not know and does not appreciate: ‘I must don my floppy ears and become their Queen again’, ‘A crown should not sit easy on the head’. Dany is losing herself, which is reflected in her inability to control her dragons (who she subsequently locks up). She finds ruling to be boring and has little patience for her subjects:

 ‘You would think they might be happier, Dany thought. They have what they came for. Is there no way to please these people?’

This comes in spite of that fact that Dany has once again failed to implement policies to support the city. Dany has instead become somewhat of a white saviour symbol, and this is jarring for many readers who up until this point surely rooted for Dany to rule the Iron Throne. This is why I love GRRM, every single character is flawed and dimensional and real- our alliances and wishes as readers change frequently and at no point can I pin point exactly what will happen. It is when Daenerys challenges the cities customs, particularly banning fighting pits that she encounters deep hatred. She is kind and- I’m sure anyone now would say- right, but she is politically inexperienced. This backlash heightens Dany’s loneliness and uncertainty, as she begins to realise that her faith- her dragons- can bring her power, but not good leadership. She experiences imposter syndrome and a self-loathing which cannot be tamed by faith in her dragons.

‘Mother of dragons. Mother of monsters. What have I unleashed upon the world? A queen I am, but my throne is made of burned bones, and it rests on quicksand. Without dragons, how could she hope to hold Meereen, much less win back Westeros? I am the blood of the dragon, she thought. If they are monsters, so am I’.

I love the parallels to Jon at this point, in his own feelings of grief, doubt and isolation. I’d love to go more into them as a pair but it’s just so hard to get a good grasp on everything in these books because GRRM has written so, so much to be analysed! We really do start to see parallels to Jon and Daenerys story and experiences in the later books, and I think GRRM is beginning to show how Jon’s upbringing and influences have grounded him and primed him to potentially rule in contrast to Dany- he has become a remarkable leader. (Also, parallels to the connection to their animals and own wellbeing).

Dany becomes increasingly worn by this backlash, and dilutes her own morals as she begins to listen to her subjects: ‘It was blood the Meereenese yearned to see’. ‘If this is truly what my people wish, do I have the right to deny them? It was their city before it was mine, and it is their own lives they wish to squander’. Her doubt is worsened by her interactions with Xaro, who acts to develop Dany’s character. She is beginning to accept that she must change her ideals and leadership, but still lacks the knowledge and cannot find the place for the gentle ideals she upholds in the barbaric world she is part of. Xaro has disillusioned Dany and shattered the identity that she has been striving to achieve:

‘He was too eloquent for her. Dany had no answer for him, only the raw feeling in her belly. ‘Slavery is not the same as rain,’ she insisted. ‘I have been rained on and I have been sold. It is not the same. No man wants to be owned.’

 ‘A poor city that was once rich. A hungry city that once was fat. A bloody city that once was peaceful.’ ‘His accusations stung. There was too much truth in them.’

Daenerys is defensive and uncertain. At this point, there is significant foreshadowing and dramatic irony should Dany take the path of the show and die at the end:

‘You will only bring it destruction, as you did Astapor’.  ‘Do not close your eyes to your peril, Daenerys… ‘Have you forgotten? I have dragons.’ ‘That would make me very sad, my sweet delight… for young and strong as you now seem, you shall not live long. Not here’. ‘You have grown suspicious, Danerys. Always. ‘I have grown wise, Xaro’. ‘I am no butcher Queen’.

Marriage and proposal

There is definite growth in Dany’s character as she stops running for the first time and faces her doubts. Her decision to marry Hizdahr Zo Loraq marks Daenerys choice to rule seriously and show her respect for the customs and interests of Meereen’s people. It is in this dutiful marriage that Dany becomes truly disenchanted, similarly to Sansa and Cersei: ‘it may be that this is the best end we can hope for’. This is possibly the first time Dany has acted from duty rather than impulsion (of her own free will, not the will of Viserys) and here Dany’s actions are similar to choices Jon would make. I also enjoyed the contrast in Dany’s selfless decisions to Cersei’s current refusal to remarry (although I 100% would do a Cersei). Dany  is also learning- as have Sansa and Cersei- to use her beauty and perception as youthful/naïve to give her an advantage where she can. This is essential due to the sexism in this world .There are some nice Cersei parallels/contrasts throughout this book, particularly how Dany deals with the plague that infects her people in contrast to Cersei shutting out and hating the subjects of Kings Landing. Still, even this decision reflects Dany’s overall flaws; she decides to feed the dying despite knowing that she does not have enough resources for the healthy. This shows the contrast between Dany’s kind nature and actions, and her often poor judgement. Her fatal flaw is her desire to fix her wrongs only after it’s too late and has the potential to cause more harm.

Despite her sense of duty, Dany’s decision to marry is an unpopular one, particularly to Selmy, who tries to appeal to Dany by telling her that she is unwanted in Meereen but anxiously awaited in Westeros. The fact that Dany will not be convinced even after being compared to Rhaegar marks how lost she is at this point in time: ‘Prince Rhaegar’s sister has come home at last’. ‘If they love me so much, they will wait for me.’

It is at this point that Quentyn offers a marriage and alliance to Dorne. This is an exceptional opportunity, which Selmy tries to emphasise, but which highlights how stubborn and scared Dany is. She chooses to marry Hixdahr despite being told that the Dornish alliance is the key to ruling Westeros. Daenerys is at this point plagued by prophecy and mistrust:

‘Sometimes there is truth in dreams… The sun’s son. A shiver went through her. ‘Shadows and whispers.’ What else had Quaithe said? The pale mare and the sun’s son. There was a lion in it too, and a dragon. Or am I the dragon?… Dreams and prophecies. Why must they always be in riddles? I hate this. Oh leave me, Ser. Tomorrow is my wedding day.’

Selmy keeps trying, but she’s exhausted, defeated and in denial as to the significance of this opportunity. ‘One day I shall return to Westeros to claim my father’s throne, and look to Dorne for help… I may die before I see my seven Kingdoms. Westeros may be swallowed by waves. Come. It’s time I wed.’ Dany marries, yet admits to herself that she feels restless and overwhelmed. She is left full of regrets, having sacrificed so much to be stubborn.

I’ll also briefly (hopefully) mention here that Dany is significantly influenced by Daario at this point, whom she believes she is in love with. Daario manipulates and promotes Dany’s more impatient and ruthless qualities, and uses this influence to oppose Selmy’s council. Dany has never allowed herself to grieve Drogo, and compares Daario’s relationship to her marriage: ‘Daario had helped her to remember. ‘I was dead and he brought me back to life. I was asleep and he woke me.’ Selmy is frustrated by the careless way Daenerys acts around Daario (we forget she is so young) and dismays the influence Daario holds. This is evident when Dany suggests Selmy help her to find someone to ‘remove’ Brown Ben, a direction with which Selmy is very uncomfortable and Dany is uncharacteristically callous . ‘You are too honest and too honourable’.  This could be interesting foreshadowing for the relationship she will have with Jon and the contrasting views of opinion and action, leading to her downfall. Daenerys then asks that Quentyn accompany her to see the dragons: . ‘A flicker of doubt passed across the long, solemn face of Barristan Selmy. ‘As you command.’ Dany’s lack of trust is deepening and those around her are losing their grip on her actions. Dany listens to what Hizdahr says and compromises her own morals more as time goes on and she gets more tired. However, there is a scene in which she does at least forbid dwarves fighting without consent. I believe this is here to foreshadow how she might treat Tyrion.

Drogon and prophecy

‘When the sun rises in the west and sets in the east,’ she said sadly. ‘When the seas go dry and mountains blow in the wind like leaves. When my womb quickens again, and I bear a living child. Then you will return, my sun-and-stars, and not before’.

When Dany is finally reunited with and carried away by Drogon, she finally begins to grieve, relearn who she is and accept her nature. Drogon marks Daenery’s sense of self and helps her to remember:  ‘He is fire made flesh, she thought, and so am I’.

She feels physically ill and is burned following this journey, but Dany feels free and content: ‘Dany knew the lure of home’. She is hesitant at first, but gives in to Drogon and trusts him ‘On Drogon’s back she felt whole’. Drogon attempts to revisit Dragonstone, but seems to accept that Dany is not yet ready for this. He brings her back to Dothraki lands, and reminds her of the hope that she felt there:

 ‘Not since those half remembered days in Braavos when she lived in the house with the red door had she been as happy’.

I love this chapter so much and the way Drogon helps to reunite Dany with her identity. We feel as exhausted with and as Dany by this point and crave this point for her. She finally takes the time to delve into her psyche and remember what has brought her to this moment, abandoning her mantra ‘if I look back I am lost’. During this time, Dany dreams of Viserys, seeing and accepting the dualities of truth; she loves him, she recognises his terrible nature. Daenerys grieves the chaining of her dragon, and grieves the loss of Jorah. It is through a vision of Jorah that Dany decides it is time to look forward to Westeros. She again accepts that she is both angry at Jorah and ready to accept him back in her council:

 ‘Your War is in Westeros, I told you’. ‘Lost because you lingered in a place you were never meant to be, murmured Ser Jorah, softly as the wind. ‘alone because you sent me from your side’. ‘You are a queen, her bear said. In westeros’.

‘I was tired, Jorah. I was weary of War. I wanted to rest, to laugh, to plant trees and seem them grow. I am only a young girl’. ‘No. you are the blood of the dragon.’

This (Hamlet, Lion King, Jesus/God type exchange) solidifies Dany’s change, and let’s her move forward. She hears the bells of Kahl Drogo, smiles and recalls the prophecy. It is at this point that we leave Dany- hopefully for now and not forever (pls let Winds of Winter appear) and the Khalasar who have found her.  

This was an absolute ramble for no reason other than I love these books with all my heart and wanted to revisit them. I have so much more to say and there’s so much I’ve missed. I’d love to read any comments you have and any of your own theories or perspectives. Thank you so much for reading this!

Mythology/religion

I really don’t have the energy at this point to analyse fully haha, but my true love is mythology and I wanted to mention just a wee bit of the Greek myth references I’ve noticed- I’ve done a whole blog post on this before 😊. Again, I’ll have missed loads and would love to read your comments. I think Daenerys is intentional named (by GRRM) after Arys, due to the fact that character names often parallel their influences and personality- others are Arya/Artemis, Cersei/Circe etc. Dany was born of destruction and brings War wherever she goes. She- and Targaryen’s in general- is a symbol of the War and conquering.

I also think Dany parallels Aeneas and the Aeneid, but I would have to do a lot more research on this subject (I read this book a good few years ago now and don’t know how much of it I took in!). From what I have noticed: Dany’s protection from fire and disease parallel Aeneas protection given by the Gods throughout his journey. It is also similar to Jesus’s miracles, and the death of the pale mare in the Dany plague chapter definitely has some religious and mythological symbolism that I can’t fully remember. ‘The comet mocks my hopes, she thought, lifting her eyes to where it scored the sky. Have I crossed half the world and seen the birth of dragons only to die with them in this hard hot desert?’- religious symbols, doubt they are for her, doubts herself, feels fear. Similar to religious prophets.

Dany’s reasoning and purpose are also similar to my memory of Aeneas’; she strives to find love and peace yet battles between these personal wants and a desire to rule and immortalise her name- led by prophecy, destiny and family legacy. She wants to match Rhaegar (and Aegon the conqueror) as Aeneas tries to match the feats of the Trojan heroes and his Goddess mother Aphrodite.

The epiphany Hamlet vibes last chapter also reminded me of religious symbolism that I can’t place just now because my mind is frazzeled, and the epiphany’s that he has throughout his journey. Also, significance of the underworld!! (Really wish I had the energy to research all this properly!). Also, if I can one day be bothered, I’m definitely going to look at what the end of the Aeneid can tell us about Dany’s possible future, because I’m sure we still have a significant amount of time before Winds of Winter, never mind A Dream of Spring. I’m just going to end here with one more quote, which I have taken to mean we will see her and Jon meet sometime in the future:

 ‘Off in the distance, a wolf howled. The sound made her feel sad and lonely’.

Daenerys Targaryen analysis (Part 1)

A Game of Thrones

Identity and relationships

We meet Daenerys as a young girl enslaved by her brother’s words and abuse, yearning for some semblance of peace and home. ‘Dany had cried when the red door closed behind them forever’.

She has no interest in politics, as she believes will have no part in it other than as Viserys wife. She believes herself to be an object and fully accepts the word of Viserys. Her relationship with Drogo is therefore incredibly complex, as he signifies oppression and slavery, but also the beginning of her freedom. Crucially, he (in the books) is the first man to ask her permission and he never abuses her. I would argue though, that in the confines of this world, her lack of choice in the marriage negates this consent. Daenerys is given space and time whilst Khaleesi to heal and reflect on the words she has been fed. He complicated relationship with Viserys changes, as she loses fear alongside parts of her naivety and innocence, particularly after she becomes pregnant:

‘My brother will never take back the Seven Kingdoms’, Dany said. She had known that for a long time, she realised. She had known it all her life.’

In place of Viserys, Jorah becomes a confident and father figure, strengthened by Dany feeling his presence as a reminder of her ties to Westeros. Through this relationship and trust, he is subtly allowing Dany to realise the significance of her place in the West, as an alternative to Viserys. By the time of Viserys’ death, Dany is starting to associate herself with the dragon, something she never did before her role as Khaleesi. Dany struggles with her identity, and tries to create a sense of self by her collective, monarchist thinking. She doesn’t yet have her own desires, or when she does- a peaceful family life- she forsakes them for the sake of the Targaryen dynasty. It is clear that Dany has been pushed to believe in the Targaryen cause her whole life, as it plays a huge part in her outlook, yet she does not know this world, and it’s not something she herself cares about or strives for:

‘With Viserys gone, Daenerys was the last, the very last… She must not forget’.

As Dany searches for identity, Rhaegar’s legacy plays a significant part in her sense of morality and rational. She strives desperately to act in a way that would please one of the only relations she has who was perceived by the world as good, kind and fair. Jorah (and later Barristan Selmy) realise the power in this and use this urge to live up to Rhaegar to influence Daenerys. Dany begins to recognise and name herself heir, particularly after she has been hardened by the death of Drogo and her child. It is at the end of A Game of Thrones that Daenerys has accepted that she will return to Westeros by and for herself. Drogo’s funeral and the subsequent birth of her dragons also signify Dany becoming a woman, and it is at this point that prophecies become significant.

‘Viserys is dead. I am his heir, the last blood of House Targaryen. Whatever was his is mine now’.

 ‘She saw crimson fireflies and great yellow serpents and unicorns made of pale blue flame; she saw fishes and foxes and monsters, wolves and bright birds and flowering trees, each more beautiful than the last. She saw a horse, a great grey stallion lined in smoke, it’s flowing mane a nimbus of blue flame. Yes, my love, my sun-and-stars, yes mount now, ride now’.

Politics and slavery

In developing her sense of self and place in the game of thrones, slavery is very significant to Dany and themes of slavery can be seen early on:

‘There was no slavery in the free city of Pentos. None the less, they were slaves’.

Dany sees herself in people who experience the slavery that she herself has dealt with since childhood. Daenerys genuinely wants to help people, like Rhaegar did, and anti-slavery philosophies guide her strongly. It is also clear, however, that she has a very black and white view of freedom. She has never learned how to lead, unlike those primed from birth for royalty, and she does not yet think critically. This is evident in her sense of entitlement and heroism after helping Mirri Maz Duur:

‘Dany felt she could trust the old, plain-faced woman with her flat nose; she had saved her after all.’

Dany does not consider the hardships that Mirri Maz Duur has already faced and fails to consider the feelings of those she has ‘freed’. This is similar to Dany’s inner monologues and discussions throughout the books regarding other cultures. Dany often fails to consider the needs and desires of those that she is leading. She genuinely wants to help and wants to create a sense of family and community, but her privilege and entitlement are often her downfall, for example, the tragic result of blood magic used on Drogo.

Themes of ‘madness’ begin from this point in line with the significance of prophecy. From this point, Danerys often finds herself questioning her own sanity, and creates the mantra ‘if I look back, I am lost’.

‘Was it madness that seized her then, born of fear? Or some strange wisdom buried in her blood? Dany could not have said’.

It is not until later books, that Dany becomes more nuanced in these views, for example, the bloodshed evident in Qarth.

 ‘Is it only the plunder they see? She wondered. How savage we must seem to these Qartheen’.

A Clash of Kings

Identity and relationships

Grief is a prevalent theme for Dany, or rather, her refusal to deal with grief as she pushes on instead. Her relationship with Jorah is intensified as is her lack of self esteem and her doubt. Jorah reveals his feelings whilst Dany is vulnerable and her grief complicates things, as she values and feels for Jorah strongly as a mentor, friend and father figure (good old daddy issues). The revelation that Dany is now infertile- or believes she is- also impacts her deeply:

‘What man would want a barren wife?.. He can never have me, but one day I can give him back his home and honor. That much I can do for him’.

She almost feels that she owes Jorah love due to her own upbringing and abusive relationship with Viserys. Loss has permeated Dany’s life and she frequently recalls the death of everyone who has loved her. Feeling safe and loved is something that is extremely significant to Dany, particularly after the loss of Drogo, and she projects this by trying to support those around her, and a fierce desire to create a sense of home.

‘My great bear, Dany thought. I am his Queen, but I will always be his cub as well, and he will always guard me’. It made her feel safe, but sad as well. She wished she could love him better than she did’.

Despite her grief, or to deny it, Dany allows herself for the first time to imagine a life as Queen and to consider what this will mean.

‘I want to make my kingdom beautiful, to fill it with fat men and pretty maids and laughing children. I want my people to smile when they see me ride by, the way Viserys said they smiled for my father’.

Danerys desires are still not driven by her own interests, rather in the interest of living up to the Targaryen legacy. She strives to become a conqueror as a means of showing the world and herself what she can achieve. Dany has internalised Viserys stories, and has never questioned that their father was good and wrongfully accused. At times, her desire to live up to her father’s name and conquer drive Danerys until she becomes progressively more unattainable and difficult to council. These actions are very dependent on Dany’s self-esteem at the time, and it is when Rhaegar is the influence that Daenerys is more stable.

Prophecy and madness

Following the death of Viserys, Daenerys begins to consider the Targaryen stereotypes, particularly the rumours of insanity and darkness. These permeate her inner thoughts, predominantly after Dany experiences visions in the house of the undying. Dany becomes consumed by the prince who was promised and is certain that Rhaegar was meant to be the prophesised.

‘’Aegon’ he said to a woman nursing a newborn babe in a great wooden bed. ‘’What better name for a King?’’ ‘’He has a song.. He is the prince that was promised and his is the song of ice and fire’’. ‘’There must be one more’’. ‘The dragon has three heads.  She later says she’s certain it was Rhaegar.

‘’The shape of shadows…morrows not yet made…drink from the cup of ice… drink from the cup of fire… three heads has the dragon… child of storm…’

‘Yet even crowned, I am a beggar still. I have become the most splendid beggar in the world, but a beggar all the same. She hated it, as her brother must have. He must have known how they mocked him. Small wonder he turned so angry and bitter. In the end it had driven him mad. It will do the same to me if I let it’. ‘No, that is defeat. I have something Viserys never had. I have the dragons. The dragons are all the difference’.

At the end of book two, Dany has become significantly more lost and paranoid. The dragons are essential to her wellbeing, signifying her own faith and desire to keep going.

A Storm of Swords

Identity and relationships

Jorah continues to have a significant influence on Dany and play an important role, for example, she is concerned about Jorah’s judgement of Daario and her feelings for him. She feels safe with Jorah, and feels connected through him to Westeros and her brother. This is tainted when Jorah kisses Dany, resulting in her admittance to herself of the loneliness, isolation and weight that Dany is feeling. This power and influence is particularly important in the lead up to Dany’s ‘madness’ should that be the route GRRM goes down, after Dany finds Jorah’s treason.

‘I tell you truly, Daenerys, there is no man in all the world who will ever be half so true to you as me’. ‘No true knight would ever kiss a queen without her leave.. What Dany wanted she could not begin to say, but Jorah’s kiss had woken something in her, something that had been sleeping since Khal Drogo died.. Sometimes she would close her eyes and dream of him, but it was never Jorah Mormont she dreamed of.’

Jorah uses his influence to try and council Daenerys when she attempts to buy the unsullied with the involvement of her dragons: ‘Go forth and kill the weak? Or, ‘go forth and defend them’. Interestingly (to me anyway, hahaha) from this point, Dany’s inner monologues often appear to battle between using strength or kindness to rule. This could be marked as dramatic irony should Dany go on to treat Kings Landing similarly to the show’s depiction. Daenerys morals tend to become flimsier in times of desperation, and she grapples with how she should use her power. Rhaegar is again her port of guidance, and Jorah’s remarks significantly impact Dany:

‘At the trident, those brave men Viserys spoke of died beneath our dragon banners- did they give their lives because they believed in Rhaegar’s cause, or because they had been bought and paid for?’’ (Dany)

 ‘’Rhaegar fought valiantly, Rhaegar fought nobly, Rhaegar fought honourably. And Rhaegar died.’’ (Jorah)

Later, when Dany reflects on her decisions: ‘She felt desperately afraid. Was this what my brother would have done? I’m not religious and know religion is a sensitive topic, so I’m not going to say too much, but I would like to mention the interesting religious parallels that play out in ASOIAF. Dany could be likened to Jesus in her self-defined role in the prophecy. Following the vision (and the birth of her dragons), she truly believes in the three headed dragon, and that it is her fate to rule, and yet Dany often feels doubt in her own actions and place. Rhaegar acts as a Godlike figure to Dany at these times. Quaithe also appears almost as a religious messenger whenever Dany feels lost, guiding her towards her path: ‘Remember. To go North, you must journey South. To reach the west, you must go East. To go forward you must go back, and to touch the light you must pass beneath the shadow’.

I love the introduction of Selmy to Danerys world, and feel that he adds a more pure, less biased council for Dany than her previous relationships. Dany instantly loves and trusts Selmy for his personal knowledge of Rhaegar. She will, however, stop Selmy when she feels that he is undermining Dany’s Godlike vision of her brother: ‘Dany did not want to hear about Rhaegar being unhorsed’. Selmy provides Daenerys with a more nuanced perspective of the War throughout the books. He characterises Rhaegar as gentle and kind, a lover of song and stars, interestingly a contrast to the ‘ultra-masculine’ depiction of a successful ruler that Dany has been trying to take on. Selmy humanises Rhaegar:

‘Not sour, no, but… there was a melancholy to Prince Rhaegar, a sense of doom. He was born in grief, my Queen, and that shadow hung over him all his days.’

Selmy challenges Dany’s idea of Ned (key to future encounters with Jon). ‘Stark was a traitor who met a traitors end… Lannister or Stark, what difference? Viserys used to call them the Usurper’s dogs. All the dogs are just as guilty’ He tries to balance Daenerys black and white thinking as he tells her of Ned’s part in trying to stop Robert from harming her. He also understands that he may have an influence over Dany’s decision to go to Westeros. Throughout her time at Meereen, Selmy almost conditions Dany, telling her that Rhaegar would be proud whenever Daenerys leans in to her gentler instincts. He is used to dealing with Targaryen’s and provides almost a moral compass for Daenerys.

.Meereen was never your city, her brother’s voice seemed to whisper. Your cities are across the sea. Your Seven Kingdoms, where your enemies await you. You were born to serve them blood and fire.’

Prophecy and madness

Selmy is able to soothe and reassure Daenerys when she worries that she has the ‘Targaryen taint’: ‘Every time a Targaryen is born, the gods toss the coin in the air and the world holds its breath to see how it will land.’ Dany is able to confide in him and begins to feel safe to question Viserys perspectives. At this point, she is incredibly tired and frequently considers how Targaryen’s before her dealt with the burdens of ruling. Daenerys is lost and philosophical regarding the future she wants.

‘Was my father truly mad? She blurted out.’ ‘There is some good to be said of my father, surely?’. ‘There is, Your Grace. Of him and those who came before him… and Rhaegar. Him most of all.’ ‘I wish I could have known him.’ Her voice was wistful.’

 ‘All alone but for my brother. Viserys should have protected me, but instead he hurt me and scared me worse. He shouldn’t have done that. Why do the gods make kings and queens, if not to protect the ones who can’t protect themselves? ‘Some kings make themselves. Robert did.’ (Jorah) ‘He was no true King,’ Dany said scornfully. ‘He did no justice. Justice… that’s what kings are for’.

This isolation paranoia is heightened greatly when Selmy reveals Jorah’s betrayal. This is a pivotal moment for Dany, as she loses her friend and feels that her connection to Selmy has been tainted.

 ‘I was going to take you home! I should say the word and burn he two of them. Was there no one she could trust, no one to keep her safe? ‘Are all the knights of Westeros as false as you two?’ ‘They betrayed me. But they saved me. But they lied’.

The undying had said she would be betrayed twice more, once for gold and once for love.’ (I’m interested in thinking more about the prophecy when I read other POV’s. I do wonder if the once for love will be Jon killing Dany?)

Politics and slavery

Dany is disillusioned by the slavery, and injustice that she has come across, and her own trauma often results in Dany acting emotively rather than politically. One of the first things Dany does following the fall of Astapor is to abolish the custom of naming the Unsullied as slaves. She also frees the slaves within the city. These extremely well intentioned gestures are however not well considered, as Dany then fails to accommodate for the needs of these freed people. She cannot provide the city with money, education or laws. This becomes a common theme with Dany the conqueror and yet due to her privilege and entitlement, Dany fails to see her shortcomings.  

‘I gave them the city, and most of them were too frightened to take it’. ‘I told them they were free. I cannot tell them they are not free to join me’.

When Dany later attempts to free Meereen, Jorah advises that she should move on, due to the starvation and sickness her own followers are facing. ‘You cannot free every slave in the world, Khaleesi. Your War is in Westeros’. Dany is angry at this council, believing that failure to free the people is defeat. Daenerys is driven by kindness and a love for the children she sees suffering. Ending slavery is also important to Daenerys as something that she sees as part of her own identity, legacy and the carving of her own name and reputation within the Targaryen legacy. In freeing the city, Dany makes the decision to torture and kill the slavers, a decision which plagues Dany. ‘It was just. It was, I did it for the children.’  This marks the start of her making decisions as ‘Queen’ rather than Daenerys. Dany frequently battles her own kind heart and what she feels a ruler ‘should’ do, particularly difficult in a barbaric world where Kings frequently exude toxic masculinity.

 ‘Is this the face of a conqueror? So far as she could tell, she still looked like a little girl. No one was calling her Daenerys the conqueror yet, but perhaps they would.’

She is disillusioned by the end of ASOS, as her first time ruling does not elicit the hero complex that she strives for: ‘The widows will curse me all the same’. Dany is beginning to realise that her actions have consequences and that she is not yet equipped with the skills and knowledge required to rule. ‘All my victories turn to dross in my hands… Whatever I do, all I make is death and horror.’

My favourite new reads of 2021

A very late Happy New Year! I am remotivated to post this then get on with some more up to date regular 2022 posts! I also love posting on Instagram @carlybooks_ and looking at bookish accounts, so please follow me there if interested! 😊 I never count rereads in this list because I reread old favourites, so here are my 5 favourite new reads of 2021 (p.s. there are fuller descriptions of each book in 2021 blog posts so these are just wee snippets):

Honourable mentions:

Klara and the Sun, Kitchen, After Dark, Luster, Exciting times. I’ve written about these books in more detail in 2021 blog posts, but they all have the sort of style of writing I love- character driven, almost plotless, somehow dreamy, reflecting on social issues and their impact on people in today’s society. I fell in love with Japanese literature this year, it’s very beautiful and almost magical!

Number five- Pandora’s Jar by Natalie Haynes:

‘’Now, in Pandora’s Jar: Women in the Greek Myths, Natalie Haynes – broadcaster, writer and passionate classicist – redresses this imbalance. Taking Pandora and her jar (the box came later) as the starting point, she puts the women of the Greek myths on equal footing with the menfolk. After millennia of stories telling of gods and men, be they Zeus or Agamemnon, Paris or Odysseus, Oedipus or Jason, the voices that sing from these pages are those of Hera, Athena and Artemis, and of Clytemnestra, Jocasta, Eurydice and Penelope.’’ (Pandora’s Jar synopsis)

I didn’t read as much non-fiction as I usually do this year, but this was a great one! I didn’t love Natalie Hayes fiction books as much when I read them, but the way this book was written weaved in all the characters with modern social issues so well, I’d recommend! I’d also recommend listening to the songs she mentions throughout, listening to Beyoncé lemonade during the Medea chapter was quite an experience.

Number four- Beautiful World, Where Are You by Sally Rooney

‘’Alice, a novelist, meets Felix, who works in a warehouse, and asks him if he’d like to travel to Rome with her. In Dublin, her best friend Eileen is getting over a break-up and slips back into flirting with Simon, a man she has known since childhood. Alice, Felix, Eileen and Simon are still young – but life is catching up with them. They desire each other, they delude each other, they get together, they break apart. They worry about sex and friendship and the world they live in. Are they standing in the last lighted room before the darkness, bearing witness to something? Will they find a way to believe in a beautiful world?’’ (Beautiful World, Where are You synopsis)

I listened to this as an audiobook which I think is always the way to go with Irish narrators because I love the accent and it adds to the feeling of a conversation unfolding. I think this might be my favourite of her books. I love the storytelling, elements of mental health and the social commentary on social media/technology and climate change. I do feel the need to say that the characters are a bit pretentious (why do they always go on a spontaneous holiday hahaha) and Rooney’s characters are definitely privileged with first world problems. I think it’s important to keep this in mind whilst reading, but I do always feel for the characters (I was more interested in one perspective than the other though). I’d love to read more books that look at the impact of social media on our self-esteem and mental health.

Number three- Shuggie Bain by Douglas Stuart

‘’It is 1981. Glasgow is dying and good families must grift to survive. Agnes Bain has always expected more from life. She dreams of greater things: a house with its own front door and a life bought and paid for outright (like her perfect, but false, teeth). But Agnes is abandoned by her philandering husband, and soon she and her three children find themselves trapped in a decimated mining town. As she descends deeper into drink, the children try their best to save her, yet one by one they must abandon her to save themselves. It is her son Shuggie who holds out hope the longest. Shuggie is different. Fastidious and fussy, he shares his mother’s sense of snobbish propriety. The miners’ children pick on him and adults condemn him as no’ right. But Shuggie believes that if he tries his hardest, he can be normal like the other boys and help his mother escape this hopeless place.’’ (Shuggie Bain synopsis)

This book was so powerful, and the relationships were beautiful and very sad. I felt even more connected to the story because of the LGBT elements and the setting- some of my own family members have experienced some of these issues and I think they’re still sadly very relevant around Glasgow. I think this book manages to be filled with hopeful moments despite the poignant sad ones. I’m currently reading Young Mungo as I got a review eBook on net galley, woo (did not know that was a thing until last month!) and I think I like it even more, although I love wee Shuggie as a character so much. I’d 100% recommend reading some Scottish fiction if you’re from elsewhere around the world, I’d love to know if it still has the same impact or gives you a new perspective on Scotland. I’d also be curious to know where you are from and what books you’d recommend from your home country! 😊

Number two: Norwegian Wood by Haruki Murakami

‘’When he hears her favourite Beatles song, Toru Watanabe recalls his first love Naoko, the girlfriend of his best friend Kizuki. Immediately he is transported back almost twenty years to his student days in Tokyo, adrift in a world of uneasy friendships, casual sex, passion, loss and desire – to a time when an impetuous young woman called Midori marches into his life and he has to choose between the future and the past.’’ (Norwegian Wood synopsis)

This was one of the first books I’ve read translated from Japanese and I loved it! I always love books which are basically just about characters and relationships where nothing really happens, and this is exactly that bit with a kind of whimsical feeling. There was something so interesting and unusual about this book and it’s made me want to go to Tokyo one day even more than I already did. I”d really recommend this, although I’d first check the trigger warnings as there are themes such as suicide. I’d also recommend this as a first choice for Murakami’s books because it’s a lot more realistic and less insane than his others. I read 4 of his this year and I am finding some uncomfortable themes with the ways he writes women. Overall though, Norwegian Wood has become one of my favourite ever books!

Number one: Duck Feet by Ely Percy

‘’Twelve-year-old Kirsty Campbell used to like school – that is until she started first year at Renfrew High. Set in the mid-noughties and narrated in a Renfrewshire dialect, Duck Feet is an episodic novel comprised of 65 linked short stories, all following the lives of working-class school-girl Kirsty and her pals as they traverse from first to sixth year of high school.’’ (Duck feet synopsis)

Another Scottish book, they did well last year! I also went to a Waterstones reading and signing from Ely Percy and it was amazing to hear their perspective on their perspective on writing the story, it brought it to life even more. I’d like to go to more book events in 2022! I’m also happy that I joined an Instagram book club last year, hosted by @scottieandthebooks. It gave me the chance to read with others, making it a less solitary experience and creating a culture of celebration of Scottish literature (although I’m too shy to really speak in it haha!) Anyway, I loved book so much, I went to school nearby Renfrew a few years after this is set and it’s so close in time and place that I felt like I was reading about my own school (good and bad times haha!). My favourite chapter VL just flashed me back to forgotten (or repressed) times. I also loved the deeper moments and themes throughout and related to so many of the characters. I’d love to read more about the queer characters in Duck Feet if Ely writes this book. I’d 100% recommend this book to everyone!

Thank you everyone who read or commented last year, I honestly love reading comments and talking about books as reading can feel lonely otherwise! Please let me know of your favourites reads of last year, I’d genuinely love to know! 😊 I know we’re still in difficult times, but I hope you have an amazing year, and please reach out to me if you’d ever like to talk- about books, mental health or anything else!

Some more of my ‘art’ part 3

My first time painting Hogwarts as part of my sister’s Christmas present. I find buildings quite hard to paint because of all the greys, but it was still fun to try. I also gave up with the mountain haha, so I used fake gold leaf and goblet of fire pages to make a wee collage (this part looks better in real life).

This is based on a famous painting I saw in Glasgow by an artist called Scarlett Raven. Hers is obviously much more detailed and beautiful, but as I don’t have £10,000, I tried my best to make my own version!

This is the closest I’ll get to drawing a person because faces are too hard! I love Medusa and patterns so decided to combine them which I think worked fairly well for this one. The first Medusa painting I ever tried genuinely looks like Gladys from friends hahaha.

Earlier in the year I enjoyed using acrylic pens to make wee patterns on some old records.

This one was hard again because of the greys- I’ll have to eventually buy decent acrylics or oils if I’d like to try painting properly- but here is a wee version of the Sagrada Familia to remind me of the fun times where travel was a safe thing to do. Hopefully those times will return! 🙂

Lastly, a quick little pen and ink bright pattern which kept me busy for a wee while during isolation (yesterday was my freedom day, wooo! Feeling very lucky to have only had minor symptoms thanks to having both vaccines).

I love painting using bright colours, please recommend any artists who use bright colours or detailed patterns! If you draw or paint, please link your blog or insta, I always love to get inspiration and see other’s work 🙂

Books I read in October & November 2021

I have covid, woo! So I’m using this time to write a wee summary of October and November books, because whilst I was too lazy to write them as a went along, I’m also too fussy to not write anything because it will annoy me not having a post for each book of the year haha. So please feel free to read this strange mini thing, and I promise to write proper full posts again next year for the 3 people who want them haha. Please let me know what you’ve been reading, and if you have any recommendations going into 2022! I always like to try and start off the New Year with some good books.

Duck feet by Ely Percy (new read, physical book)

My favourite of the two months, I loved this book so much. It’s set in a town not too far from where I grew up, a few years before I went to high school, and it honestly brought back so much nostalgia- in the best and worst ways haha! I loved it! I’ll talk more about this in yearly favourites, but if anyone reading is Scottish, was your school also obsessed with the idea of being a VL?

The Norse Myths by Carolyne Larrington (new read, physical book)

I still know very little about Norse mythology, so I enjoyed this book! It was fairly easy to follow and it’s interesting, so I would recommend it for the genre (also got me excited about rereading A Song of Ice and Fire at some point. BTW, analysed Daenerys’s whole story and wrote about 12,000 words for a blog post which got deleted and can’t get back- still too sad to talk about it more haha!) I still think it’s going to take me a long time to properly familiarise myself with these stories, primarily because I sadly only speak English, and I struggle with a lot of the pronunciation of the names and places. I love the monsters and creatures in these myths!

Antigone Rising by Helen Morales (new read, physical book)

This book was an interesting non-fiction analysis of mythology and modern feminism. I naturally ended up comparing it to Pandora’s Jar which I did find more interesting, mainly because of the choice of topics, I think. I found the latter chapters and topics far more interesting than the first. I’d be interested in reading more books like this, I think I’d like any I read now to be written by more people of colour to allow me to gauge a wider perspective and learn more, particularly important when reading about feminism.

No one is talking about this by Patricia Lockwood (new read, physical book)

This was such an unusual book and for that reason I can’t decide how I feel, however, it was very moving. I would recommend reading the themes and warnings before deciding whether to read, as I think this is a very unique experience so I wouldn’t like to say too much, but I would like anyone reading to feel prepared.

Carmilla by J. Sheridan Le Fanu (new read, eBook)

I really didn’t know how to feel about this, it was a short book and gave the Halloween vibes I was looking for, however, probably due to the period it was written in, it had some very old fashioned or unusual metaphors and imagery, particularly surrounding homophobia. I can’t decide if this was a commentary on the time and purposefully written, or the authors own views. Either way, I always try and fail to find new Halloween books I like, so I think I’ll just enjoy binging the Vampire Diaries tv show every October.

The Illustrated Mum by Jacqueline Wilson (reread, physical book)

Back on my Jacqueline rereads, this is another great one- for slightly older readers, but saying that, I was probably about 7 haha, I think younger kids just tune out what they don’t understand yet. This one focuses on themes on mental illness in the family and the reversed parent/child roles.

Kiss by Jacqueline Wilson (reread, physical book)

Another of hers for older readers, this was always has a different feel for me but that’s maybe because it’s one of the last new books that I read by her, maybe aged 11. This one focuses on sexuality and puberty.

Twilight by Stephanie Meyer (reread, eBook)

Not going to give it more time, I had a low week and wanted a Halloween vibe hahaha.

Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone by J. K. Rowling (reread, physical book)

For this book, I want to talk a bit about the idea of separating the art from the artist. My views on this- which I’m not saying are right, and I sometimes waver on myself- are that I will reread but not continue to buy. Once I know that an author has done something wrong, I will never support their work again by buying future books etc. I will never buy another Harry Potter book or merch that will help she who must not be named to profit. However, I have loved Harry Potter since I was a wee girl and it holds so many special memories for me. These books remind me of my childhood and of my dad who use to read them with me. He bought me the first 5 and I can remember the excitement of holding one of these books new in my hands. I have always felt so nostalgic and at peace when I read this series, especially leading up to Christmas. So, I think that in a case like this, only where the book is incredibly nostalgic and one which I read in childhood, I will separate the art and continue to reread the books. However, I will reiterate that I do not condone the words of the author and will never buy from them again.

Books I read in August/September 2021

Every time I went to write about my August books I just really could not be bothered, hahaha. One reason was that I leave it all too long and can’t remember lots- I’m trying to change this for October by writing notes after I finish each book so I can get a bit better. Instead of writing half remembered thoughts, I’m just going to list the books I read in August here: Such a Fun Age (mainly enjoyed), Soul Tourists (not my fav of hers), The Wolf Den (mainly enjoyed), The Mash House (not my genre, but good). I just decided to have a little break, especially considering this is just a hobby and really does not matter in the grand scheme of things! I did listen to a podcast today though, which made me very excited about reading and books, and it has motivated me to try to put my best effort into posts going forwards (excluding this one haha as I’ve done the usual thing of forgetting most of what I read). I hope you’ve been having a good couple of months, please let me know what you’ve been doing or reading! 😊

Buddha Da by Anne Donovan (physical book, new read)

‘‘Anne Marie’s dad, a Glaswegian painter and decorator, has always been game for a laugh. So when he first takes up meditation at the Buddhist Center, no one takes him seriously. But as Jimmy becomes more involved in a search for the spiritual, his beliefs start to come into conflict with the needs of his wife, Liz. Cracks appear in their apparently happy family life, and the ensuing events change the lives of each family member.’’ (Buddha Da synopsis)

In September, I found an Instagram book club called ‘The Scottish Book Club’, for which this was my second read (The Mash House was the first). This book club is great, encouraging Scottish people to read books written by fellow Scots, often including Scot’s language. The host, Natalie is really welcoming and often manages to contact the authors to get involved in live chats which is an amazing way to learn more about the books! I’d recommend joining if you’re Scottish and have Instagram! 😊 Buddha Da is written in Glasgow dialect which I find really easy to follow being from there, but I would encourage anyone interested to try as it makes for a really authentic account of many Scottish lifestyles. I loved this book, the characters were incredibly likeable with great relationship dynamics, even if they made some annoying yet realistic decisions. This book focuses on the themes of identify/future and loss/grief, using Buddhist philosophies to contrast with an ‘ordinary’ Scottish family. This was so interesting, because a lot of Scottish culture, especially Glaswegian is about humour which can often lead to people hiding their feelings, particularly stereotypically males. This made for such a great character study of Jimmy, with interesting perspectives on the changes he makes and whether things like taking the time to meditate or ‘self help’ can actually become quite selfish if they cause you to distance yourself from the needs of others around you. I felt like the story is reflecting on being your own person whilst in a relationship and the ways in which burying sad emotions can lead to co-dependency. There were so many themes to reflect on and I’m excited to hear from Anne Donovan to learn more, as it’s semi-autobiographical. I’d definitely recommend this book (please let me know if you do read it and want help with any Scots phrases haha!)

Favourite/Meaningful quote:

‘Glasgow for it. That’s the gemm. Embra’s lovely, a great place for a day oot or a wee break but Glesga’s hame.’

Beautiful World, Where Are You by Sally Rooney (audiobook, new read)

‘‘Alice, a novelist, meets Felix, who works in a warehouse, and asks him if he’d like to travel to Rome with her. In Dublin, her best friend Eileen is getting over a break-up and slips back into flirting with Simon, a man she has known since childhood. Alice, Felix, Eileen and Simon are still young – but life is catching up with them. They desire each other, they delude each other, they get together, they break apart. They worry about sex and friendship and the world they live in. Are they standing in the last lighted room before the darkness, bearing witness to something? Will they find a way to believe in a beautiful world?’’ (Beautiful World synopsis)

I haven’t read too many Irish books, but I’ve loved each one that I have read, I think mainly because they feel like a conversation almost, they feel quite homely if that’s the right description by marking out the simple details of daily life without every feeling slow. I’ve listened to all of Sally Rooney’s books which has definitely helped my positive opinions because Irish accents are my favourite and listening adds to the feeling of a conversation unfolding. I listened to her other books a few years ago so I don’t remember how strongly I felt, but like most people I enjoyed Normal People a lot more. I think Beautiful World may now be my favourite of hers. Before I compliment this book too much, I do feel the need to say that the characters are a bit pretentious (why do they always go on a spontaneous holiday hahaha) and Rooney’s characters are definitely privileged with first world problems. I think it’s important to  keep this in mind whilst reading, but her story telling is excellent and I do always feel for the characters (I was more interested in one perspective than the other though). I think they are very self-aware and reflect on their own feelings of guilt whilst dealing with mental illness, so their more pretentious qualities are definitely written intentionally. I enjoyed that this book almost breaks the fourth wall, giving Rooney an opportunity to add in some commentary on her own experiences as an author and the controversy/opinions that come with becoming more well known. I also really liked the discussions surrounding technology and social media and their impact on the modern world, these really resonated with me as I do often find myself thinking about the impact of media and technology on my ability to communicate and my own self esteem. I think social media has made a lot of things easier for us, but left us with a lot more time to fill, a lot of room for negative comparisons and a lot of isolation and loneliness. I find these conversations so interesting, and I would love to read more books reflecting on social media (please let me know if you’ve read any!) Overall, I would recommend this, but as with all her books, prepare for her characters to be very white and privileged. I enjoyed the overall message being conveyed, the characters finding a sense of peace or meaning in the modern world that they have been blaming for the sense of feeling unfulfilled; I think unfulfilled or lost is something that lots of people are now experiencing. I also enjoyed the links to our own reality at the end of the book.

Favourite/Meaningful quote:

‘’do you ever experience a sort of diluted, personalised version of that feeling, as if your own life, your own world, has slowly but perceptibly become an uglier place? Or even a sense that while you used to be in step with the cultural discourse, you’re not anymore, and you feel yourself adrift from the world of ideas, alienated, with no intellectual home? Maybe it is about our specific historical moment, or maybe it’s just about getting older and disillusioned, and it happens to everyone… When we were young, we thought our responsibilities stretched out to encompass the earth and everything that lived on it.”

‘’It is hard in these circumstances not to feel that modern living compares poorly with the old ways of life, which have come to represent something more substantial, more connected to the essence of the human condition.”

Six Tudor Queens: Katharine Parr by Alison Weir (audiobook, new read)

‘’Two husbands dead, a boy and a sick man. And now Katharine is free to make her own choice. The ageing King’s eye falls upon her. She cannot refuse him… or betray that she wanted another. She becomes the sixth wife – a queen and a friend. Henry loves and trusts her. But Katharine is hiding another secret in her heart, a deeply held faith that could see her burn… KATHARINE PARR. HENRY’S FINAL QUEEN. HER STORY.’’ (Six tudor Queens synopsis)

I won’t write too much about this book as I’m mentioned most of this series in previous blog posts, but I love this series! These books were interesting, at least semi-factual and a great way to learn more about the Tudors from the perspective of the Queens. They are such easy reads which provide great satisfaction to know that you are learning more about history in such an interesting way! This wasn’t my favourite of the series (she definitely wasn’t the most dramatic queen haha) but I still loved it and would recommend reading! I listened to these books which made it easier to read any slow bits and helped the characters to really come to life. So happy to have found these books! 😊

The Sopranos by Alan Warner (eBook, new read)

‘’The choir from Our Lady of Perpetual Succour School for Girls is being bussed to the national finals in the big, big city. And it’s an important day for The Sopranos – Orla, Kylah, (Ra)Chell, Amanda Konky and Fionnula (the Cooler) – pub-crawling, shoplifting and body-piercing being the top priorities. Then it’s time to lose that competition – lose, because a nuclear sub has just anchored in the bay and, tonight, the Man Trap disco will be full of submariners on shore-leave. There is no time for delays…But after the fifth bottle of alco-pop up the back of the bus it’s clear that all is not going to plan, for anyone. The Sopranos are never going to be the same.’’ (The Sopranos synopsis)

This is such a strange one to write about because I watched the film (Our Ladies) and read this book, but I can’t really decide what I thought of either. I found something very intriguing about both, maybe because they are Scottish are I can’t resist a book in a setting I’m familiar with. The fact that I chose to read the book and watch the film suggests that I did like them, but it is more of a feeling of intrigue rather than enjoyment. I think, on reflection, that I maybe feel strange because this was written from the male gaze when it is a story about catholic schoolgirls, two or who are gay (btw, I’m always strangely satisfied when I instantly know someone’s gay, it really is like a superpower hahaha). I think the fact that it was written by a male and is over 20 years old has led to a slightly uncomfortable vibe surrounding this book although it’s hard to pinpoint exactly why. It felt almost like an Irvine Welsh counterpart for young teenage girls. I think I’ll end by saying I do like the book, but I wouldn’t recommend it.

The Women of Troy by Pat Barker (physical book, new read)

‘’Troy has fallen. The Greeks have won their bitter war. They can return home as victors – all they need is a good wind to lift their sails. But the wind has vanished, the seas becalmed by vengeful gods, and so the warriors remain in limbo – camped in the shadow of the city they destroyed, kept company by the women they stole from it.’’ (The Women of Troy synopsis)

I’ve mentioned before that I’ve now read quite a lot of Greek myth retellings, so I’ve become fussy with them. I was interested to read a story which focuses on the aftermath of the war as I most of the myths I have read focus on before or during. This was an interesting perspective on the aftermath, questioning the meaning and purpose that people are left to grapple with after conflict, and our nature as human beings to feel dissatisfaction; we often strive to achieve something only to be left with a sense of discontentment or peace, in exchange for a drive to move on the next thing that we think will give us a sense of purpose. The characters in this story are (very rightly) left feeling doubt, dissatisfaction and intense guilt following the events of the Trojan war. I think the reason I was let down a little was the marketing- recent myth retellings always emphasise the need for female voices and a feminist take. This book is marketed as a feminist retelling, literally emphasising this in it’s title, which left me a little frustrated when it often strayed away to focus on male characters, often switching to Neoptolemus’ perspective. This was not a problem in itself, but I get a bit bored of such marketing because it appears to become about selling books and looking progressive, rather than the actual content (if that makes sense). I was hoping to learn more about the Trojan women themselves and would love recommendations for books following these characters. I didn’t realise that this is almost a sequel to the Silence of the Girls so I would recommend reading/rereading this first, as I couldn’t remember much about Breseis’ relationship with Achilles and inner monologue in this retelling. I think I’d have taken more from this book had I read it directly after the Silence of the Girls. I also found it a little strange (again, maybe I’m just very fussy haha) that sometimes the phrases used by characters seemed very modern or took me out of the story. This therefore made it uncomfortable when the R slur was frequently used in a very derogatory manner towards certain characters. It felt very odd and wrong to use this slur, and I feel that due to the modern phrases used elsewhere, the time period of the story cannot be used as reasoning.  

Nightshift by Kiare Ladner (physical book, new read)

‘’When twenty-three-year-old Meggie meets distant and enigmatic Sabine, she recognizes in her the person she would like to be. Giving up her daytime existence, her reliable boyfriend, and the trappings of a normal life in favour of working the same nightshifts as Sabine could be the perfect escape for Meggie. She finds a liberating sense of freedom in indulging her growing preoccupation with Sabine and plunges herself into another existence, gradually immersing herself in the transient and uncertain world of the nightshift worker.’’ (Nightshift synopsis)

This is an example of when my ramblings about books suffer because I forget to take notes- I read this in the first couple of days of September and I’m coming to realise that I have a shocking memory haha. Nightshift is advertised as a thriller, which I typically don’t read, but I was intrigued because reviews I watched on YouTube referred to it as more of a character study, which I would, having now read it agree with. I always get so excited for spooky season and Halloween as soon as I see one Autumn leave haha, so this was definitely a good time to read the book! I found the character Sabine to be quite annoying to read (actually, I disliked them all haha) because she’s written as that stereotype of a narcissistic ‘manic pixie dream girl’ trope, but this was very purposeful and contributed to the characters dynamics and decisions. I don’t tend to have a problem with books with unlikeable characters so I don’t think the story suffered because of that. The book was very fast paced- I read it in a day- and interesting throughout but wasn’t a favourite of mine. I would give it a go if you read the synopsis and like the sound of it, but please know that it is definitely a character study rather than a thriller. It’s also very important to read the trigger warnings as there is an incredibly difficult chapter in this book!

Her New Best Friend by Penny Batchelor (physical book, new read)

‘’Mum-of-two Audrey is horrified when during a moment of distraction in the park, her pram with baby Wilfred in it rolls down the hill and into a pond. Fortunately for her, Claire Jones is nearby and rescues Wilfred, soothing Audrey and daughter Antonia with coffee and cake in a nearby café. No harm is done. However, the frightening experience dents Audrey’s confidence and she replays the events over and over, convinced she can’t have forgotten to put the brake on. To make matters worse she keeps spotting a shadowy figure everywhere she goes and becomes sure that someone is stalking her. Does Claire really have Audrey’s best interests at heart?’’ (Her new best friend synopsis)

This is the first book I’ve been sent to read by a publisher (guess I’m famous hahaha) which was so fun! Crime and thrillers aren’t a genre I ever really read, but it was good to read a book out of my comfort zone. I’m glad I did read it because when I do read thrillers, I remember how fast paced they are, and the story was interesting. I also really enjoyed reading an own voices account of disability, of which I’ve read few in the past and need to read more frequently. The only thing I didn’t particularly enjoy was that at times I thought it was slightly too fast paced in the sense that there was not enough time to build up the thrills or twists. I’m still going to continue my pace of reading a crime/thriller every 5 years or less haha, but I know that this is one of the most popular genres for readers so I would recommend this one if you do enjoy thrillers, particularly around the spooky season. 😊

This ended up being very long hahaha. Please let me know how you’ve been and what you’ve been reading! 😊 I would recommend looking up the Scottish Book club on Instagram, it’s great! Also, may as well plug my own haha, please follow me on carlybooks_ if you’re interested (Dusty my cat is a regular feature).

Books I read in June 2021

Pandora’s Jar by Natalie Haynes (physical book, new read)

‘’In Pandora’s Jar: Women in the Greek Myths, Natalie Haynes redresses imbalance. Taking Pandora and her jar (the box came later) as the starting point, she puts the women of the Greek myths on equal footing with the menfolk. After millennia of stories telling of gods and men, be they Zeus or Agamemnon, Paris or Odysseus, Oedipus or Jason, the voices that sing from these pages are those of Hera, Athena and Artemis, and of Clytemnestra, Jocasta, Eurydice and Penelope.’’ (Pandora’s Jar synopsis)

I’ve previously read some of Haynes myth retellings and was sad to feel a bit detached whilst reading. I did, however, still want to read this book and I’m so glad I did because I really loved it, I think it could be in my favourites of the year! 😊 It felt to me like reading a podcast which I loved, it was easy to read, well written and always interesting. I love learning more through books and feel excited when I start to retain more knowledge about the many (MANY) characters in mythology, and it was great to learn more in this book, particularly about the amazons- I’d previously only really known a little about Penthesilea’s death and taken the rest from Wonder Woman- and Medea, who’s story is so horrifying and interesting. I also enjoyed Haynes references to pop culture throughout as they never felt like too much or brought me out of the book- I’d really recommend listening to Lemonade whilst reading Medea’s chapter! This book has intrigued me to read more non-fiction about these myths from different perspectives, please let me know if you’ve read any good books in this category!

Witches, Warriors, Women: Mythology’s Fiercest Females, written by Kate Hodges and illustrated by Harriot Lee Merrion (physical book, new read)

‘’From feminist fairies to bloodsucking temptresses, half-human harpies and protective Vodou goddesses, these are women who go beyond long-haired, smiling stereotypes. Their stories are so powerful, so entrancing, that they have survived for millennia. Lovingly retold and updated, Kate Hodges places each heroine, rebel and provocateur fimly at the centre of their own narrative. Players include:Bewitching, banished Circe, an introvert famed and feared for her transfigurative powers. The righteous Furies, defiantly unrepentant about their dedication to justice. Fun-loving Ame-no-Uzume who makes quarrelling friends laugh and terrifies monsters by flashing at them. The fateful Morai sisters who spin a complex web of birth, life and death.’’ (Witches synopsis)

This was my second mythology-based non-fiction book of the month, and it filled with short, illustrated character accounts. I bought this online from Edinburgh’s social justice book shop ‘Lighthouse’ after reading about the racially charged and homophobic abuse staff were dealing with, resulting in the shop temporarily closing; if you can, please support their shop! I enjoyed this book and the accompanying illustrations, although they weren’t my personal art style, I prefer really bright colours and patterns. It wasn’t my favourite book of the month, however, it was an interesting read and it was good to learn more about Scottish myths! I’d like to continue to learn about Celtic and Scottish mythology. 😊

Theogony and Works and Days by Hesiod (physical books, new reads)

‘’Hesiod belongs to the transitional period in Greek civilization between the oral tradition and the introduction of a written alphabet. His two major surviving works, the Theogony and the Works and Days, address the divine and the mundane, respectively. The Theogony traces the origins of the Greek gods and recounts the events surrounding the crowning of Zeus as their king. A manual of moral instruction in verse, the Works and Days was addressed to farmers and peasants.’’ (Theogony & Works and Days synopsis)

I do not know how I ended up owning this, which means I probably borrowed/stole it from my sister who has a random assortment of books from her literature degree haha. I tend not to like plays unless watching them as a play, especially those written long ago as the writing can frazzle my brain a bit. However, I was on a mythology binge and this was in my flat so here we are. These plays are so famous and studied so often that I know they are important, however, I am not their target reader and I found them very, very boring so I’m just going to leave this here.

Song of Achilles and Circe by Madeline Miller (physical books, rereads)

My last blog post is basically a love letter rambling about these books, so I won’t go into them here but I’d be thankful for anyone who’d like to read that post or comment your own thoughts about these books on it 😊

My Policeman by Bethan Roberts (physical book, new reads)

‘’It is in 1950’s Brighton that Marion first catches sight of Tom. He teaches her to swim, gently guiding her through the water in the shadow of the city’s famous pier and Marion is smitten–determined her love alone will be enough for them both. A few years later near the Brighton Museum, Patrick meets Tom. Patrick is besotted, and opens Tom’s eyes to a glamorous, sophisticated new world of art, travel, and beauty. Tom is their policeman, and in this age it is safer for him to marry Marion and meet Patrick in secret. The two lovers must share him, until one of them breaks and three lives are destroyed.’’ (My Policeman synopsis)

I loved the idea of this book, and I was very intrigued to read it. Sadly, I didn’t find this book very interesting, and it was quite a challenge to get through. This led me to think about this is more detail as I eventually dnf’d ‘The Paying Guests’ earlier this year as well as reading but feeling bored and disappointed by ‘Carol’. All three of these books are set in the early/middle 1900’s, and all three are centred around gay/bi characters. I’ve loved books set in this type period before, for example, ‘The Crimson Petal and the White’ which is one of my favourites. When reflecting on why I loved this as opposed to the others, I concluded that Crimson Petal is so vivid, passionately written and features dimensional characters. It also features themes that were particularly taboo for this time period, for example, prostitution, but Faber did not shy away from these themes and instead brought them to life, vividly highlighting the hardships and impact on the characters wellbeing. The other books I’ve mentioned, including My Policeman felt flat in comparison. I think the nature of this conservative time period can often mean that the characters can be written in a way which feels stilted. This works well in reflecting the constraints of the time, however, can- for me- make the reading experience feel flat and a bit glum. I think this explains why I am often disappointed by historical fiction set in this time period. Interestingly (to me, probably not to anyone else because I’m just rambling hahaha), I don’t feel this way whilst watching historical fiction of this time period. I love Downton Abbey and Titanic, for example, so it maybe that my imagination is lacking when reading.

In reflecting back, I also feel like I struggled with these books due to the exploration of life as an LGBT person in the early-middle 1900’s. I am always looking for LGBT representation and I appreciate that these stories reflect the risk, stress, homophobia and taboo surrounding being gay. I am thankful that these authors choose to write inclusively. I think, however, I’ve read enough depressing LGBT stories now that I just want to read happy or at least more positive depictions of gay relationships. I think in coming to accept my own sexuality, I already deal with internalised homophobia and feel the weight of current LGBT issues. Reading about them is therefore quite draining and weighs on me, although I acknowledge that it’s so important. I’m therefore going to avoid LGBT accounts in historical fiction for a while, and I’d love if you could comment any positive, happy LGBT books which you have read. 😊 (Sorry, I did not plan for such a tangent here haha!) Ps. I do think Harry Styles is a great choice, and think he has the charisma to play the character well in the film adaptation!

Everyday Activism: How to Change the World in Five Minutes, One Hour or a day by Rachel England (physical book, new read)

‘’This inspiring, easy-to-use guide will help kickstart any activist’s journey. From supporting independent businesses and amplifying marginalised voices, to community gardening and giving to a food bank, there’s something you can do to make a positive change – whether you have a day, an hour, or just five minutes to spare.’’ (Everyday Activism synopsis)

I found this by chance is a bookshop this month and read it in one sitting; this is an easy read with some interesting, positive reflections and ideas for activism. Some are common sense, but all were interesting and very achievable small ways to make a difference. I’m sure there are more advanced or nuanced books of this genre, as well as some books on activism which are far more diverse. I’d love to read these in the future and try to actively work to make positive change, but this book was an interesting starting point! 😊

Thank you for reading, especially as I accidentally rambled lots haha! I’d love any recommendations based on the books I’ve been reading, and I’d love to know what you have been reading recently. I hope you’re well! 😊

My love of Madeline Miller- Circe and The Song of Achilles

• 

• 

After rereading Circe and Song of Achilles this month I felt like I wanted a rambling little post to remember the way I feel about these books. Apart from a few books I vaguely remember years ago, Madeline Miller’s were the first Greek myth retellings I read. I first read Circe in summer 2019, choosing it without knowing anything about it firstly for the beautiful cover and then because it mentioned Greece where I was lucky enough to be going on holiday. So, on a beach in Crete feeling truly enveloped in the setting, I started the book which has spiralled me into an intense mythological fascination. I’m lucky enough to now own over 20 mythological books and I think I’ve read over 30, with each bringing more intrigue rather than any sort of feeling that I’ve ‘overdone’ it.

I absolutely love rereading books, arguably more than reading new books. As a nostalgic, semi-routine enjoying person, my favourite books bring feelings of comfort and warmth (almost said joy but I will leave the Christmas ramblings for another couple of months). Within two years, I’m usually ready to reread an old book and bring myself back into the memories and emotions that came with it. A year plus of a pandemic and two years in Scottish weather have undoubtedly contributed to my desire to reread Circe, a book which I now associate with the warmth and sea breeze of its origin country.

Madeline Miller has received lots and lots of praise and hype, which in her case I think is truly deserved. To explain why, I’ll now try to get on to the actual books and stop the rambling. Paralleling the order in which I originally read them, I’ll start with Circe:

Circe

‘’In the house of Helios, god of the sun and mightiest of the Titans, a daughter is born. Circe is a strange child – not powerful and terrible, like her father, nor gorgeous and mercenary like her mother. Scorned and rejected, Circe grows up in the shadows, at home in neither the world of gods or mortals. But Circe has a dark power of her own: witchcraft. When her gift threatens the gods, she is banished to the island of Aiaia where she hones her occult craft, casting spells, gathering strange herbs and taming wild beasts. Yet a woman who stands alone will never be left in peace for long – and among her island’s guests is an unexpected visitor: the mortal Odysseus, for whom Circe will risk everything. So Circe sets forth her tale, a vivid, mesmerizing epic of family rivalry, love and loss – the defiant, inextinguishable song of woman burning hot and bright through the darkness of a man’s world.’’ (Circe synopsis)

The writing in Circe flows so well. It’s beautiful and intricate, feeling very detailed and powerful whilst also being very easy to read: my favourite mix. Whilst focusing on Circe, her story weaves in other myths and we meet different famous or infamous characters. This felt interesting and natural to me, where it sometimes felt forced in other retellings. I’ve mentioned before that whilst I enjoyed some retellings including Ariadne, they felt almost stretched- as though they tried to do too much with too little source material. Miller manages to create full and meaningful depictions that interested and engaged me whilst feeling almost real in a way (this is a good time to mention that these are all my own random lil opinions and not necessarily correct). I love that in Circe, Greek terms and words are used (I was going to say that the reader learns Greek words, but I have a shocking memory for languages) and that so many of my favourite books are taken from Greek mythologies. For example, in my blog post called A Song of Ice and Fire Norse and Greek mythology parallels, I noted the parallels between GRRM’s Cersei and the Circe in this story. These were only basic thoughts and parallels from the endless ones to be found. I think parallels are one of the reasons I love mythology so much; rather than feeling frustrated that I’ll never realise them all, I love knowing that I’ll learn new things and feel excited every day I read a retelling.

Song of Achilles

‘’Greece in the age of heroes. Patroclus, an awkward young prince, has been exiled to the court of King Peleus and his perfect son Achilles. Despite their differences, Achilles befriends the shamed prince, and as they grow into young men skilled in the arts of war and medicine, their bond blossoms into something deeper – despite the displeasure of Achilles’s mother Thetis, a cruel sea goddess. But when word comes that Helen of Sparta has been kidnapped, Achilles must go to war in distant Troy and fulfill his destiny. Torn between love and fear for his friend, Patroclus goes with him, little knowing that the years that follow will test everything they hold dear.’’ (Song of Achilles synopsis)

Being the second myth retelling that I read (and remember), this book was my first experience of the Trojan War. I will say, this led to me feeling quite disillusioned about Achilles when I then went on to read any other account of his personality hahaha. I am glad to note that Patroclus remains one of the few genuinely good characters in any depictions he features in, I love him. Throughout this story I really felt the urgency, passion and struggle that these characters experience and whilst I didn’t cry, I felt very moved by Patroclus and Achilles story; I also love a book that really makes me feel the tension that the characters are feeling, and the cave parts of this book did it so well. Maybe I’m biased, but while I appreciate all retellings, I far prefer the stories that depict Patroclus and Achilles as a couple, and I do feel that the source material heavily hints this. Accounts that deny these characters as lovers give me strong ‘historians will say they were good friends’ vibe hahaha.

I love Miller’s narrative choices- whilst featuring some of the most famous characters, namely Odysseus and Achilles, she chooses to read about the lesser known or rather lesser heard characters of Circe and Patroclus and gives them such a full, interesting voice. Miller may almost romanticise characters, but in a mythological world of absolute horrors, I appreciate these depictions; particularly as these myths are just that- stories passed down for us to imagine and reimagine.

Themes and comparison

 On both first read and reread I’ve binged Miller’s books one after the other, which naturally leads me to compare and wonder which is my favourite. The answer is that I truly cannot decide. Both times, I’ve tentatively said that Song of Achilles just has the edge, but I genuinely feel that this is just because it was fresher in my mind. I love both for such different reasons and feel that they compliment each other almost as a duology. I will say that at times both felt slightly slow on my first read- Circe because it spans such a long time and Achilles because of such a heavy war plot. On rereading, I didn’t experience this feeling at all and read both books over 4 days. I think this is because I now have a better knowledge of the myths and endless characters featuring throughout. Despite saying this, I would 100% recommend these books as a starting place into the world of Greek mythology.

The pacing and writing style is something that I found very interesting whilst reading; Miller’s writing has objectively improved by Circe- whilst still being very accessible, it’s much more intricate than Song of Achilles. I do, however, think this is almost done purposefully; Circe is a complex Goddess with eons of time to pace out her life and develop her craft. She is also frequently lonely and lost. The pacing of this story heavily reflects Circe’s mindset and the timespan it follows- at times peaceful, at others almost stilted. The latter part, for example, felt more frantic to me and fast paced as Circe raised her restless, energetic mortal son. Song of Achilles, felt in comparison urgent and fast paced- for lack of another phrase, it felt very human. The characters are passionate and young and energetic, whilst facing the philosophies of a good life, and the loss and grief that comes with the prophesised early death. In saying that, the writing style also parallels Patroclus- human and simplistic as opposed to Circe’s intricate wisdom. I cannot decide which I liked more, I just hope I am projecting how much I truly love these books and would recommend them.

I was also very interested in the themes of humanity throughout both books. Whilst feeling so different and focusing on very different life experiences, both books centre around humanity and what it feels to be human, or at least what it feels to find a purpose in life. I loved Circe’s inner monologues depicting the Gods and her own distance towards her immortality, ultimately choosing her own life and embracing the paradoxical simplistic yet vivid and vital human life span.

“I thought once that gods are the opposite of death, but I see now they are more dead than anything, for they are unchanging, and can hold nothing in their hands.”

This contrasts Achilles, and therefore Patroclus choice to forgo a peaceful life to engage in ‘heroic’ acts and the form of immortality that surrounds them. These books have philosophical undertones due to Miller’s choice to write from the perspective of very thoughtful, very human characters. It is this that has led to these stories becoming some of my favourites; themes of humanity, purpose, life and loss are always my favourites.

“True. But fame is a strange thing. Some men gain glory after they die, while others fade. What is admired in one generation is abhorred in another.” “We cannot say who will survive the holocaust of memory.’’

“I think: this is what I will miss. I think: I will kill myself rather than miss it. I think: how long do we have?”

I genuinely put off writing this because I wasn’t sure what I would say and now I have absolutely rambled on, hahaha. Thank you so much if you’ve read all of this, please let me know your own thoughts on these books. I’ll end by saying, Miller has become one of my favourite writers because she introduced me to mythology and I’ve yet to find a retelling that I’ve enjoyed or felt more from than hers. I loved experiencing these stories the first time and learning; I now love them in a different way. Rereading was so exciting because I know understand the references, know more about the characters and I can see what I’ve learned. These books reignited my love of learning in a way that I haven’t felt in a long time. Things like Uni didn’t really work for me. I’m not an academic, whilst I got the degree, I genuinely cannot think of much I learned from Uni due to the nature of cramming for exams and writing essays on areas I didn’t find interesting. Reading is a greater form of learning for me personally, and in mythology I’ve found books that match my personality and interests exactly- comfort and familiarity of a world and characters I’m starting to know, whilst always allowing for new material and things to learn.

Books I read in May 2021

Ariadne by Jennifer Saint (physical book, new read)

‘Ariadne, Princess of Crete, grows up greeting the dawn from her beautiful dancing floor and listening to her nursemaid’s stories of gods and heroes. But beneath her golden palace echo the ever-present hoofbeats of her brother, the Minotaur, a monster who demands blood sacrifice. When Theseus, Prince of Athens, arrives to vanquish the beast, Ariadne sees in his green eyes not a threat but an escape. Defying the gods, betraying her family and country, and risking everything for love, Ariadne helps Theseus kill the Minotaur. But will Ariadne’s decision ensure her happy ending? And what of Phaedra, the beloved younger sister she leaves behind?’ (Ariadne synopsis)

Firstly, both cover versions of this book are so beautiful! This book has very willingly spiralled me back into a Greek mythology retelling binge. I enjoyed this book and loved getting to learn more about Ariadne as there are still so many stories, I’m not very familiar with (I somehow always got mixed up with Medea and Ariadne, so I finally know the very different differences haha). Unfortunately, I didn’t love this book. Madeline Miller’s retellings were the first myth retellings I read and I love them so incredibly much that I end up comparing all others to them. Whilst Ariadne is good, I didn’t feel very strongly towards it. Sometimes I feel like myth retellings can feel slightly stretched or ‘bitty’ since they are coming out of such short original material and I did feel this way towards Ariadne. That’s not to say I wouldn’t recommend it, if you’re able to read myths without comparing each to your favourite books I think you’d love it! 😊  Also, this book discusses constellations often, I’m interested to learn more about constellations in relation to myths, please let me know of any good books or websites!

After Dark by Haruki Murakami (physical book, new read)

‘The midnight hour approaches in an almost-empty diner. Mari sips her coffee and reads a book, but soon her solitude is disturbed: a girl has been beaten up at the Alphaville hotel, and needs Mari’s help. Meanwhile Mari’s beautiful sister Eri lies in a deep, heavy sleep that is ‘too perfect, too pure’ to be normal; it has lasted for two months. But tonight as the digital clock displays 00:00, a hint of life flickers across the television screen in her room, even though it’s plug has been pulled out.’ (After Dark synopsis)

I don’t even know what to say about Murakami anymore, he’s slightly insane and full of genius. I think this would be such a good book of his to start with! It’s short, with lots of his common themes and favourite tropes and a lil bit of the surreal but little enough that it’s very readable. It takes place in one night and I read it in one evening which made it so much more interesting. I feel like Murakami’s books suck me in, there is something just so interesting and otherworldly about them. I definitely recommend this if you’d like to start some of his books and want to test out whether the unique style works for you.

The Time Traveler’s Wife by Audrey Niffenegger (physical book, reread)

‘Clare and Henry have known each other since Clare was six and Henry was 36. They were married when Clare was 23 and Henry was 31. Impossible but true, because Henry is one of the first people diagnosed with Chrono-Displacement Disorder: periodically his genetic clock resets and he finds himself misplaced in time, pulled to moments of emotional gravity from his life, past and future. His disappearances are spontaneous, his experiences unpredictable, alternately harrowing and amusing.’ (The Time Traveler’s Wife synopsis)

I don’t really ‘review’ any book to be honest, but I’ve decided not to review this book at all. This is one of my forever favourite books and I’ve read it possibly 5 times now. I think writing about books, analysing them or even reading reviews has made me slightly more critical in my reading judgements- I’m not sure this is a bad thing, it lets me think more about social justice and I’m a far better judge now of books that I’ll find interesting. For this reason, I want to leave this book as a favourite without reflecting too deeply, because some of the themes and phrases have not aged well, and I am not recommending it. Instead, I’ll write about how this book makes me feel; for some reason, certain books feel so real to me and resonate with me so strongly, usually books that centre families and grief. It almost pulls at my soul, as silly as those sounds. I just feel comforted as well as paradoxically extremely emotional every time I read this book and I’m truly glad I found it- when I was 15ish I think? If you’ve read this, I’d love to know what you thought of it (also, it’s better than the film haha). 😊

Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone by she who must not be named (physical book, reread)

‘Harry Potter has never even heard of Hogwarts when the letters start dropping on the doormat at number four, Privet Drive. Addressed in green ink on yellowish parchment with a purple seal, they are swiftly confiscated by his grisly aunt and uncle. Then, on Harry’s eleventh birthday, a great beetle-eyed giant of a man called Rubeus Hagrid bursts in with some astonishing news: Harry Potter is a wizard, and he has a place at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. An incredible adventure is about to begin!’ (Harry Potter synopsis)

So. Here we are. These books have created a struggle for me, because I’ve always been one to separate art from the artist- usually because I’m lazy haha and sometimes because I prefer to think of books as their own worlds which I feel in a way can be a wee bit diminished by knowing too much about an author? I can’t explain this, I sound silly and unfair to the authors haha. Anyway, above I mentioned how much I love and feel comforted by my favourites like the Time Travellers Wife. Harry Potter has always been the same for me, it reminds me of my childhood and my dad and lots of brings me lots of comfort if I’m sad. For this reason, I will keep reading these books- albeit they are a bit tainted- and continue to ignore the existence of she who must not be named. I will not, however, buy any products or new books that bring money to the author.

I reread this book because my P5 class asked to read the illustrated version (which I already owned before she who must not be named became nameless), and as 99% of them dislike reading (which makes me sad), I was very eager to agree. I think these are funny, magical books which will become classics for children, and I think this can only be a good thing, as long as we are separating and educating.

I started off strong this month and then got really stressed at work and read nothing haha, but overall, it was a really good month, I didn’t dislike anything! Please let me know what you’ve been reading or what your thoughts are on these books 😊